A couple days later, I was in the gym running. My goal was to run 50 mins at a decent pace. I felt great. The first 10 minutes flew by. About 20 mins in, I hit a wall. How was I going to run for 30 more minutes? Again the mental battle began. Just quit. Stop running. Give yourself a break. I fought through and completed all 50 minutes.

These two episodes got me thinking. In both those circumstances, there was a moment when I made a decision. I chose to keep going. I chose to get up.

What is it that separates the successful business people from the unsuccessful ones? I would say, it’s their ability to decide to keep going. To not quit. To get up every day and give it 100%. Is it hard to do? Yes, you bet. Is it easier to complain, find excuses and give up? To mail it in? Yes it is. That’s why there are so few truly successful businesses. It’s just too hard…

Here are a couple of quotes I use to remind myself of when confronted with this struggle:

“When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.”

– Franklin D. Roosevelt

“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.”
- Walter Elliott

There are plenty examples of business that did not give up. Just when it seemed the darkest, they all had an amazing breakthrough. Consider, Walt Disney, Milton Hershey and Thomas Edison, Steve Jobs or J.K. Rowling. Here’s a great article on 7 entrepreneurs whose perseverance will inspire you.

Be honest. What are you giving yourself a pass on? What part of your business is completely out of shape? How long will you ignore it and give excuses? Business is a battle and you need to wake up every day and fight. You need to DECIDE that you are going to do something about it. If you do, day in and day out, you will win. Don’t be lazy – actually let’s not be lazy (I’m adding myself to that statement). Don’t give excuses. Decide not to give up…and give it 100%.

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I was thinking about how this law as it applies to life and how the disciplines we apply in our lives have the same “first law” effect. For example, I know I should exercise. I know this is an important discipline which is part of being healthy. I’ve gone through periods where I’m exercising a few times a week. It’s tough to get up at 5am, but I do it. I’ve noticed it’s easier to get up at 5am when I’ve BEEN getting up at 5am. If I’ve done this for a couple weeks it gets even easier. Then something happens. Maybe one morning I give myself an excuse and I just don’t get to the gym that day. I tell myself “tomorrow”. Well tomorrow comes and it’s easier just to stay in bed. A week goes by. Now it’s really difficult to get up and start again.

It’s not just the momentum of the discipline of exercise where I see this happen. It’s also in other disciplines in my life, like blogging, reading, eating right. It also happens in business. Things like setting goals, staying on track with initiatives  meeting weekly with your staff etc. The same thing happens.

So what do you do? How do you keep the momentum going? I have a few ways that I keep myself on track.

Determine Your Non Negotiables?

I’ve found that if I decide in advance what my non-negotiables are, it’s easier to keep the discipline going. A non-negotiable for me is that I must exercise 3X per week. It’s important. Do I get off track? Absolutely, but I’ve determined that this is so important that when I lose momentum, I get right back up again. BTW, you will get off track. Making this a non-negotiable makes it easier to get back on track. On non-negotiable for Astonish is our weekly executive meeting. Is is difficult to get 6 people together every week? Of course, but it’s a non-negotiable.

Put Some Metrics in Place

Using the exercise example, I use the metric of my weight. I bought a Withings scale and put it in my bedroom. I weigh myself every day. It reminds me of the discipline of eating right and exercise. If I don’t eat right and exercise I WILL gain weight. This scale serves as a way to measure if I’m off track. The scale is right next to my bed so it’s easy to use. I’ve gotten into the habit of using this every day so now I’ve built in a way to keep myself on track.

Hit the reset button

No one is perfect. You are going to mess up. It’s OK. Life is all about moving in the right direction. It’s about progress over time. Give yourself a break. When you get off track, brush yourself off and start over. Tomorrow is a new day. Life has it’s own built-in reset button – the sunrise.

So what are your non-negotiables? What are the disciplines you must have to keep your life or your business moving in the right direction? Take some time to write those down, put a metric in place to track them and when you fail, hit the reset button.

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The day came to take the boat out for the first time. The dealer who sold me the vessel showed me all the ins and outs. He started up the engine and showed me how to maneuver the vessel out of the slip. He turned the wheel to the left then headed down the long alleyway. I was petrified. I’m thinking to myself, what did I do? This doesn’t seem fun to me. How am I going to do this myself? The gentleman took another left turn then a right and slowly increased the speed. Soon we were out on the bay. He showed me how to get the boat on plane. It was early April so very few boats were out this early in the season. On a scale of 1-10 my nervousness was probably a 9.

We tooled around the bay for about a half hour. It was now my turn to take the wheel. Did I mention I was extremely nervous? I was totally tense. This was literally my first time piloting a vessel. I kept thinking that, if I was this nervous all season….it was going to be a long season. I practiced docking on the end of one of the nearby marinas. No one was around. I began to loosen up a bit. Gain confidence. Then it was time to head back to the slip. Docking a boat in a slip with other boats on either side for the first time is nerve-racking to say the least. My instructor guided me through the process. I did it. No one died. The boat didn’t sink.

I continued to be nervous every time I went out this season, but every time without fail, I accomplished my goal. My family spent time together and we made memories. The kids enjoyed themselves jumping off the stern and swimming in the ocean at Potter Cove. Beautiful afternoons, sun shining reading a book on the bow, small wistful clouds in the sky.

I say all this because there is a principle here. Sometimes, things are really really scary, but there is great joy, even peace on the other side. Taking risks and trying something new. Any boat owner will tell you that owning a boat is not a wise financial decision, but for me it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Successful people understand the relationship between risk and reward – and the reward is oftentimes not money. It’s the joy of new experiences.

How can this apply to your business? There are times when you have to do something that seems extremely scary. I may be completely out of your comfort zone, but there are great things on the other side.

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Servant leadership may seem like an oxymoron, but if you dig a bit deeper it isn’t. As a leader you should be serving those you lead. An immature person who is in leadership can begin to think that their direct reports are there to serve THEM. This is the opposite of humility. The ego is inflated. The opposite is actually true. Just because you may be high up in an organization or that you have folks reporting into you, the fact is, you should really be serving them. We’ve all met these types of folks…highly successful, but willing to give the knowledge they’ve gained to those around them.

I recently heard a speaker as this question, “are your employees better off for having worked for you?” or “is your spouse better off for being your spouse?” These are pretty deep questions. Servant leaders realize that life is not about them, but about the folks they are leading. How are you building up the folks you lead? How are they better off for having known you? Are you seeing the best in them and constantly trying to help them improve? Are you teachable and learning from them? Have you asked them what you could do to make their job easier? Do you get into the details of the issues they are struggling with and helping them solve those issues?

Leading takes time and involves casting the vision, but also helping those you lead see the pathway to the vision. This is not easy. It can be frustrating and takes patience, but again it’s not about you, it’s about them.

I am by no means the picture of a servant leader. I have a long way to go. It’s about the heart. As a leader, you should have a heart to serve others as opposed to having them serve you.

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So how do you deal with blind spots? I’ve got a few simple ways…

1. Be honest with your self

No one is perfect. One of my early blind spots was that I thought I was always right (which is completely ridiculous by the way). As a young lad, I would argue my point to death. I just wasn’t honest with myself. You’re not always right. Be honest with yourself. You will make mistakes. Own up to them and move on

2. Be teachable and humble

Once you’ve made that mistake and the blind spot becomes clear, learn from it. What is it trying to teach you? As a leader, you can fall into the trap of thinking you always need to have the answer. You don’t. Be humble and admit you’re wrong. Be teachable. I find the more teachable I am, the easier it is to be more teachable.

3. Make sure you have a feedback loop

Lastly, who are the feedback loops in your life? Who is going to tell you the truth and let you know you’re not seeing things as clearly as you think. You need these folks. The good news is if you follow point #2, everyone becomes a feedback loop.

I hope these simple steps help you as you strive to be a better leader and just a better person. Watch out for those blind spots.

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Intervention (TV series) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I’ve been thinking a lot about change lately. Astonish’s mission is to change our clients’ lives by changing their businesses. This supposes something simple. Our customers need to change. The simple truth is; every business must change. Businesses that stagnate and don’t grow slowly die. The key is to clearly understand what needs to change. That’s the first step and often then hardest.

I know I’ve written about this before, but most people are resistant to change. They fear it. Some people get sucked into negative cycles and aren’t honest enough with themselves to realize what their problems are. Change suggests you’re moving from one state to another. A stark example of this is the T.V. show intervention.  The main character in each episode has some addictive disorder. The hour program follows them around and culminates in the “intervention” where their friends and family try to get them to go to treatment – to change. What I find so compelling about the program is that the addict is so blind to their need to change. It literally takes a group of folks in a room pouring their hearts out and setting ultimatums to get the addict to agree to get help.

Now back to your business. Do you have a clear understanding of your businesses weaknesses? Is it your people, your processes, your tools, the market etc. Have you taken a hard look in the mirror? Have people been trying to tell you that you need to change and are you ignoring it hoping that one day it will magically get better? Do you even know what’s wrong? Are you confused?

I talk about teachability quite a bit at Astonish. I believe it’s one of, if not the most important ingredient in success. No one knows everything and often we can be blind to the truths around us. Teachability allows us to have the right mindset to accept new information which will eliminate blind spots.

The last scene in Intervention is when the interventionists ask, “Are you willing to accept the help we’re offering to you today?” I challenge you to have your eyes open to folks around you that may be asking the same thing.

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Here’s a list of 11 Predictable Reasons Why Change Efforts Typically Fail (again from Blanchard’s book).

1. People leading the change think that announcing the change is the same as implementing it.

2. People’s concerns with change are not surfaced or addressed.

3. Those being asked to change are not involved in planning the change.

4. There is no urgent or compelling reason to change. The business case is not communicated.

5. A compelling vision that excites people about the future has not been developed and communicated.

6. The change leadership team doesn’t include early adopters, resisters, or informal leaders.

7. The change isn’t piloted, so the organization doesn’t learn what’s needed to support the change.

8. Organizational systems and other initiatives aren’t aligned with the change.

9. Leaders lose focus or fail to prioritize, causing “death by 1,000 initiatives.”

10. People are not enabled or encouraged to build new skills.

11. Those leading the change aren’t credible—they undercommunicate, give mixed messages, and do not model the behaviors the change requires.

If you’re having problems implementing change in your organization, take a look at the list and determine the root cause. Maybe the way you manage change needs to change.

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Cover of Zig Ziglar

I’ve been trying a little experiment lately. I’ve been monitoring my thinking both for negative output (what I think and say) and input (what I read, watch and listen to).

There is a whole field of psychology dedicated to our internal thought processes or how our thoughts affect our moods and emotions – cognitive psychology. “Cognitive” comes from the word cognition which means the process of knowing or perceiving. Taking the time to truly monitor my thought processes has been interesting.

So I encourage you to monitor your thoughts. Are they positive? Are they negative? What about your words? What do you say to others? Would others see you as an encouraging person? And what about what you allow to enter your mind? (TV, radio, books). Who are your friends? Who do you hang out with on a regular basis? Do those folks build you up? Do you build them up? Do you allow yourself to be affected by these inputs in a negative way? Do you recognize negative input? I know these are a lot of questions, but ones worth asking yourself.

There’s a great scripture in the Bible that talks about this very topic, “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” The author is encouraging us to think about specific things because of how powerful our mind can. What we think affects how we feel and what we feel impacts what we do and say.

Just taking the time to do this can be totally mind opening. Once you realize your tendencies you can work to change them. You can refuse to allow negative stimulus to enter your mind (at least the stimulus you have control over). You can fill your mind with positive things. There’s a saying, “garbage in, garbage out”.

“One of the greatest gifts is the ability to choose the way we think, act or feel…” – Zig Ziglar

You can also choose to be an encourager. You can choose to say positive things to others. You can lift others up instead of dragging them down. According to Zig Ziglar is his book, “Top Performance”, “It’s a fact that you can’t tailor-make the situations in life, but you can tailor-make the attitudes to fit those situations before they arise.”

So begin monitoring your thinking. Start to look at what you allow into your mind (by what you hear or see). Guard your mind and think about the “right” things and you’ll be amazed at the results.

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Hurley & Dobson’s book focused on the Enneagram, which is another method of understanding personality types. The book describes 9 primary personality types. According to Enneagram theory, everyone emerges from childhood with one of these 9 types dominating their personality. This specific dominating personality type colors the way we see the world, make decisions and adapt to our early childhood environment. The model is a pretty deep one and I’m still absorbing the information and applying to my life.

The big take-way from the book is something I’ve always know and am continuing to apply. Teachability is extremely important. Much of our life is spent in non-teachable (if that’s such a word) mode. We think we know everything…and that thought pattern is an illusion even a self-deception. There are many things we do not know. We must force ourselves to actively listen to those around us. Pay attention to why certain situations frustrate us or get us angry. If you’re familiar with “Emotional Intelligence”, I’m talking about self-regulation. Call it humility.

zelf gemaakt (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

As a leader you should be spending a lot of time listening to your people. Really digging deep to understand what they’re saying. I don’t mean abdicating the role of a leader, but really listening to those who are at the front lines. Business is a fluid situation, things change and strategies don’t always work. As you business grows, the underlying root causes become ever more complex. Being teachable is a key that will help you understand the truth (which is not always black and white). Sometimes, you can actually be the barrier, the problem if you will. Again being teachable (or humble) will help you to move forward. This is one the principles I try to embrace as I lead the executive team at Astonish and one that I’m sure I’m only beginning to understand.

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Dan Ariely speaking at TED (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This book is chock full of examples from experiments Dan and his colleagues performed to illustrate how all of us make irrational decisions. It’s titled “predictably” irrational since Ariely is able to draw conclusions from these experiments and confirm them with follow-on studies (typically performed in university settings).

There are soooo many take-ways from the book so I’ll just highlight one here. In chapter 9 of his book, Ariely focuses on why multiple options can distract us from our main objective. All of us love to have options. If you’re like me you have a plan A, B, C, D etc.

To quote Ariely, “What is it about options that is so difficult for us? Why do we feel compelled to keep as many doors open as possible, even at great expense? Why can’t we simply commit ourselves?”

To answer the question, Ariely and his colleagues perform a series of sophisticated experiments where he attempted to measure a subject’s tendency to keep a door of opportunity open for fear of losing that opportunity. The experiment involved a literal door (actually a computer game which used doors). There were three doors in the experiment and the subject was tasked with determining which doors contained the most money. Once the subject entered the room, each click of the mouse added money to their tally. The trick was that the subject only had 100 clicks. Many subjects moved around from room to room to determine which room had the biggest payoff.

To quote Ariely again, “given a simple setup and a clear goal (in this case, to make money), all of us are quite adept at pursuing the source of our satisfaction.”

This was the first phase of the experiment. The subjects had an unlimited amount of time to browse around and determine which room had the biggest payoff, but real life doesn’t work that way. There is typically a time element. All our opportunities don’t wait for us forever. We have to choose one.

Ariely moved to the next phase of his experiment. He changed the experiment such that any door left unvisited for 12 clicks was shut down and the subject lost their opportunity to visit. The results were pretty interesting. The subjects jumped around from door to door trying to maximize their payout. Unfortunately, the end result was that on average these folks got 15% less than the folks who had chosen one door and stuck with it!

Ariely writes, “The truth is that they could have made more money by picking a room— any room— and merely staying there for the whole experiment! (Think about that in terms of your life or career.)”

Of course there were many more take-aways from the book and I highly recommend reading it. The main take-away however was that we ALL make irrational decisions. This book gave me insight into many types of decisions and how best to approach them so I’ll make the best decision possible based on rational thinking processes.

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